somewhere along the way I fucked up everything, and changed
It’s sad that my friends think that I am emotionally fucked up in the relationship department.
Sometimes I guess I’m just shocked on how much I feel I give to people and how I don’t receive the same kindness back. I don’t exactly feel like you owe me if I’ve done a favor or just helped you out because I do those things because I like to. it makes me feel good and I know what it’s like when you just need a little help or support; but when someone doesn’t appreciate what I’ve done, or disrespects me that’s when I’m disappointed. Lately I’ve notice there are people that I’ve done so much for that have done things to me that I in a million years would just not to do to someone. I am not angry just upset and hurt. I guess people just don’t think the way I do. Before making most decisions I make sure that I’m making the right one, and most importantly who will my decisions affect besides myself. I’ve always just assumed most people thought like this but as I’ve gotten older I’ve realized people are more selfish than I presumed. & I’m not saying that I’m perfect and I don’t have my selfish moments because I do but I try my best not to be that person. So when someone lets me down like that its probably one of the most disappointing things.